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Monday, July 30, 2012

A few pounds go a long way.......

I was flipping through the radio stations on my morning drive to work today.  I came across one of the local stations who were talking about men leaving their wives and girlfriends because they gained weight.  Imagine that....  So I am driving along, listening to the male DJ and the women calling in, and thinking the whole time....I feel a blog coming out of this.  It took me back to marriage number three.  As I wrote before, hubby number three was good looking and quite charming.  I met him around the time my Ryan turned one.  I had gained a little over a 100 lbs during my pregnancy.  I remember going into my doctor to have my staples removed from stomach from the c-section, and telling him I had to have diet pills to help me lose the weight.  He told me that he didn't believe in prescribing diet pills, but knowing what I looked like before I got pregnant, he prescribed them.  So when I met hubby number three, I had already lost about 75 of those gained pounds, and didn't look too bad.  A lot of people always said I was too skinny anyway.  So after we were married, I added back some extra pounds when I would go through depression because I would find out about another one of his affairs.  Then I would turn around and take it off again.  I guess the hubby didn't trust that I would be able to take it off one of the times, and started forcing workouts on me......  I didn't mind working out at all, but it was the abusive force he put me through.  So I did extensive workouts daily with the hubby standing over me.  I built muscles and had decent abs.  So, as I am listening to this radio show......I am thinking the same as most of the women calling in.  What happened to love.....  The days when you actually married for love.  Has love, marriage and relationships become that disposable?  I mean, really?  There are no guarantees when you have a tiny body that you will keep that body forever.  I never thought I would gain as much weight as I did in my pregnancy, and not be able to lose it all.  Husband number two accepted my weight.  He knew me when I was tiny.  He knew I wasn't happy with my weight, but he still accepted me for me.  I remember back after divorce number three, I had a lost weekend with the ex.  He told me that the weight thing wasn't because he didn't accept me, but because when I gained weight, my attitude got worse.  Now that I think about it.  It probably did.  What guys don't understand is what women go through over the whole weight thing.  My weight has never gotten in the way of my ability to do things.  I am a very active person.  One of the female DJ's asked the male why wouldn't you just pay for her to go to the gym or have a personal trainer.  He never gave her a straight answer.  I guess it would be too much to spend a little money on the woman you so-call love, but spend that money on a new girl.  I am still shaking my head over this one.  The DJ's said there had been a poll taken, and 65% of the male population agrees that they would leave their woman if she gained weight.  I don't know.......  It doesn't make me want to go starve myself for a relationship.  What about you?


1 comment:

Sherri Walker-McCann said...

Heck no! My question is, what if instead of gaining weight, a woman became disfigured-bc an accident or she lost her breast to breast cancer....or something like that!? So, are they saying they only love their wives bc of how they look? Grrrrrr! That makes me crazy! When I was heavier, brett never made me feel anything less than beautiful-love should not wane based on appearance. What happened to "growing old" together?